Rhett & Link Epic Rap of Manliness tekst piosenki i tłumaczenie. Posłuchaj MP3 i obejrzyj teledysk z Youtube oraz sprawdź chwyty.
Tekst piosenki
[Rhett]
I was born with hair on my chest
A gleam in my eye to latch onto a breast
I cut my own umbilical cord with my razor-sharp teeth
Then I drove home and my mom rode on in the back seat
I didn't go through puberty, puberty went through me
And it was never even awkward cause I made it happen instantly
If you addressed a letter to 'Man' and put it in the mail
Rest assured I'd receive it but I ain't gonna be your pen pal
My time is too valuable for that
I'll be too busy working a jackhammer
[Link]
You're a momma's boy
I was born in an Arctic cave
And adopted by wolves, that's how I was raised
I didn't drink milk, I suckled the fangs of venomous snakes
I killed the first man that I met with just my firm hand shake
I potty trained myself, you're still bed wetting
I smell like charcoal when I'm sweating and was the best man at my own wedding
Search Google Images for masculinity
Feel free to photoshop your face on that image of me
Creative Commons, punk
Meanwhile I'll be adjusting some really large nuts
[Rhett]
I rise before the sun, screw circadian rhythm
I bathe with sandpaper and my underwear is denim
I shave with a box cutter, blindfolded as well
Cause if I look in the mirror I intimidate myself
[Link]
I got no need for sleep, I never shut my eyes
I tie fishing lures while I memorize Apache war cries
The sun comes up when I tell it I'm ready
Then I trim my nose hairs with a razor-sharp machete
[Rhett]
I'm manly cause I'm so handy, even my feet are hands
I built a hobbit house for a homeless man without using any plans
My kids' jungle gym has a full-size trapeze
And I modified my garden hose to dispense nacho cheese
[Link]
I'm handy, too, I rerouted my bathroom exhaust fan into your bedroom
My right incisor's a Phillips head screwdriver
I made my sun deck into a holodeck where I hang out with MacGyver
[Rhett]
My GPS gets its sense of direction from me
I can drive ten hours without stopping to take a leak
I don't avert my eyes when I pass roadkill
And I teach an online course in parallel parking skills
[Link]
When my car breaks down I don't call a mechanic
I just open the hood and then I stare at it
And then I call a mechanic but I won't be cheated
He's not gonna talk me into repairs that I didn't know that I needed
[Rhett]
I can sleep alone in the woods without a tent
I might get a little scared but then I get over it
I tie knots that Eagle Scouts haven't even heard of
Like the double overhead figure-eight fischerman's bird glove
[Link]
Well, I got the know-how to properly grill every part of a cow
And when I taste a veggie patty I just spit it out
I break your face with a plate if you want it well done
And your wife is always asking me to toast her buns
[Dialogue: Rhett and Link, Nice Peter, EpicLLOYD]
Er, fellas?
Everything alright here?
Er, yeah! He was just cleaning something off my shirt
Yup, got it
Okidoki
You guys have a great day!
[Rhett and Link]
I'm too much man for a manicure
I don't even have cuticles
For the sake of convenience I keep a urinal in my cubical
I can barefoot ski
I can smell the fear of bees
I threw up in my mouth the one time that I watched Glee
I am my own boss
My middle name is Hoss
I don't even know what it feels like to sit with my legs crossed
I've never been shopping
I don't remove pizza toppings
I can tell the age of a mountain goat just by sniffing its droppings
You sniff mountain goat droppings?
Well...
[Outro: Lauren Sweetser, Taryn Southern]
Honey, somebody did a stinky, it's got your name on it
Babe, the Real Housewives marathon's about to start
And you'd promised you'd make your vegan ooey gooey bars
Ostatnio szukane utwory:
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Ouvre la bouteille lentement, lentement Ouvre la bouteille lentement, lentement À soir on fait ta piaule, écoute la soirée est so good so fuck,...
[Verse 1] On met l’cap sur un rêve mais la traversée est longue Combien trépassent avant d’toucher l’nouveau monde On est Breton, Normand, Irlan...
La place est faite de rêves, de machines à miser Contre des murs de miroirs, une lumière tamisée Service rapide, la caisse a pas l'temps d'poir...
Ils veulent mon nom, mon adresse et ma date de naissance Le taut de crimes augmente, plus que le prix de l'éssence Le respet diminue, les surs à...
[Verse 1:] Quand t’es atteint d’la seconde cause de mortalité chez les enfants Tu peux envier la liberté des gars en d’dans Pi toi t’es rienque une...
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Everybody helps me make my own mistakes If I'm left alone I'd make them anyway Great events, but can't predict What's happening in present tense...
Colder than where the cold comes from It's as bright as a burning sun Much hotter than the valley of death It makes your heart heat It's called love's...
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Inne piosenki wykonawcy
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I - am a thoughtful guy. I think about alotta things. I - am a thoughtful guy. I think alotta thoughts; about alotta things. I think about space an...
Link: First off I wanna tell ya I enjoyed the pizza Well it really wasn't great, but it allowed me to meet-cha I'd like your number But I'm not gon...
[Nerd] Yes, I am a nerd Bookworm, I’m studious From my cerebral cortex to my gluteus Back in Kindergarten I aced my college entrance exam Now, I...
I'm tied down, I'm locked up I don't make independent decisions but my wife says that I don't miss it My old friends, they don't call In fact this...
Here we have a man Who's chosen to Instagram His apple pie, a la mode. While he fumbles through the filters His ice cream has gotten "a la hot" A...
I can't believe we lived to be this old And somehow we've never seen this hole A little dip with a little bit of lint inside it Underneath this cot...
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[Verse 1: Rhett & Link] I like chocolate so dark, it's almost evil to eat I like cheese so sharp, it'll make your mouth bleed Sophisticated foo...
Now this is a tale that will explain How our lives completely and suddenly changed Just take a seat and don't disembark We'll tell you how we becam...
I'm not afraid of the dark I'm afraid of what's in the dark That I cannot see Because it's so dang dark, so dang dark, so dang dark, so dang dark...
[Chorus: Link] Naked No oh oh, I can't take it No oh you-ou-ou'll never Ever see-e-e-e me naked [Verse 1: Link] When I was a baby I born unclot...
Last week I saw you in the lobby passin, through You said, "Hey, how ya doin?" I said, "Pretty good man and you?" Well, that wasn't true I was act...
[Verse 1: Both] There's a latte and of course a cappuccino An americano and a mocha frappuccino Let us not forgetto the caffè macchiato And I woul...
Tough Decisions (A Whale Is Gonna Die)
Paper Or plastic Presents itself as a decision with an obvious answer You pick paper 'cause the plastic will end up in the ocean Giving a whale ca...
Sleep Tight (Spot the differences)
Your parents told you that we don't exist. Well, how in the world do you explain this. We're gonna eat you like we ate your neighbor Nathan. He tas...
Everything's okay 'Cause I'm on vacation We spent 14 hours on that sandcastle! Everything is great 'Cause I'm on vacation At least we're not back...
911 what's your emergency? I nailed my finger to a birdhouse accidentally Do your have some bacon (bacon?) Bacon, That's right I have bacon left o...
That picture frame Those hoodie strings (They are driving me insane) Unequal pizza slices Fonts of different sizes (It's more than I can take) M...
[Verse 1: Rhett and Link] Can you taste it? That's not enough you've got to place it Is that an onion or a leek? Wake the pink snake, sleeping in y...
Song For When You Want To Say I Love You But You Can't
Hey girl You know we've been dating for a long time now Going on five whole weeks Now that's commitment, baby So we've prepared this very special...
It’s not you; it’s me. And me don’t like you. It’s not you; it’s I. And I’m breaking up with you. You swore up and down the wall Twilight’s the...
Yo mama's so cuddly that puppies watch Youtube videos of her. Yo mama's so bold she's featured on the toolbar of Microsoft Word. Yo mama's so wise,...
My daddy can bench press 400 pounds.800 if he uses both arms. My daddy can make a delicious pizza using nothing but found items from your backyard...
[Rhett & Link talking] Hey Whatcha doing? Driving, whatcha doing? Driving and texting.. Hmmm. Are you sure you should be doing that? [Link]...