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Tekst piosenki

[Verse 1]

Minutes pass and the time went on as I'm looking back on the wasted year

Alone in my room with the torment of doom

And a case of beer couldn't face my fear

With these four walls that I called home

While I'm painting the windows black

On the wrong medication, thoughts started racing

Chest bursting heart palpitations

Gone numb my limbs started shaking

And it seemed that I can't go escape it

Cause my doctors and therapists are telling me this sickness I created

With a year of the preparation and the cost of my desperation

I was lost and my friends mistaken, asking "How was my vacation"

Like the time away from work, tied away, and hurt was recreation

Suicidal thoughts and panic attacks all social separation

But I'm forced to pose and fake it

Wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy

Suddenly I had gone heavenly talking about God can you please just grant me serenity

Like yeah, I'm suddenly religious but honestly who was I kidding

Father Jewish, mother Christian who married a Mormon, fate non-existent

Went to church to steal from collection plates, taking money stuffing my pockets

Went to shul when I'm forced to

And shove bobby pins in the electric sockets

I'm thinking the doctors tests are not correct, my opinion's irrelevant

They say it's a chemical imbalance, but there ain't no scientific evidence

But it's evident, that I never been the same

Just got better hiding the pain

My reflection, I wouldn't frame

My complexion, I could erase

I couldn't make the mold of this mask any better, holding a flask

Trying to cope with the past alone in the hope it could last

Boulder on my shoulder growing too fast

Heart getting colder frozen grew black

Still I find peace in the boom-bat

Why do I rap with a crew full of new jacks never lose that, uh


[Hook]

I'm tryna live my dream in private jets

But I can't get past all these side effects

I smile and nodded, I try to hide it best

But I can't get past all these side effects

But I'm hoping that I can be wrong, that

I could find a reason that I suffered this long

And I'm hoping that I could move on

And I could find beauty in the words of this song


[Verse 2]

Locked behind these xanny bars, drowning inside this alcohol

Depending on these chemicals, only thing that I found compatible

Any problem I choose to tackle, I would do it two tone capsule

Being stuck in a lose-lose battle

Going coo-coo, I was scared of my shadow

Paint over the pain no spacle

Take chance on my brain, no raffle

I stand in the rain as I soak til I'm carried afloat, like a boat, no paddle

Getting tired of blaming genetics but I know the machine is defective

So are we imperfectly perfect?

Or excusing ourselves for depression

All the time that I'm wishing to be someone else

Could have used to improve myself

All the personal flaws and the falls, I was cursed by it all, I could use your help

But I'm move through hell with a few screws loose and a past I'd dwell

And in fact I failed in regrets, in career to attract my sales

Relationships I'm destroying, swollowed pride to collect employment

Escaped in the play so imagine the day

When a show was delayed and avoided

All because these side effects, so many years to get my mind correct

So many tears feeling like it's time I rest but these night terrors are inside my head

Insomnia, check, vertigo, check

Had the curtains closed, so not a person knows I haven't learned to cope yet

Edible tablets are stacked during this chemical balance in act

I enter the center of gravity happily never go back


[Hook]

I'm tryna live my dream in private jets

But I can't get past all these side effects

I smile and nodded, I try to hide it best

But I can't get past all these side effects

But I'm hoping that I can be wrong, that

I could find a reason that I suffered this long

And I'm hoping that I could move on

And I could find beauty in the words of this song


[Outro] 

Tłumaczenie