Stephen Lynch piosenki

I call you from my car to say I'll be there in awhile A short plane ride and I will get to see your pretty smile. There's nothing on the radio; I'd fiddled with the dial Then I see a sign: the airport's just another mile I check my bags and think about how...

I lie next to her in the bed She's the kind of girl I'd like to wed Nevermind the fact that she's dead It turns me on It turns me on Sure, she's a little cold to the touch But that doesn't bother me much Because the embalmer did such A lovely job A lovely job...

(intro)-I wanted to write a song about the three loves of my life that have slipped away some how...but, i could only come up with two I was in love with an albino Her lack of pigment seemed like fun Her skin, the whitest alabaster Her eyes as pink, as pink a...

This is for my little girl My lady gives birth today I run to her room right away She smiles with glee, and hands her to me I look at my newborn and say Damn that's an ugly baby Damn that's an ugly ass baby I'm feeling quite concerned My semen must have turne...

(Spoken) I figured since I wrote a song about you know God and Jesus and all that I would have to give the opposition equal time. (Sung) Ever since first man has walked this Earth I have been here To whisper seeds of doubt and evil thoughts into his ear I am...

Mark: I like my toast buttered Stephen: and I'll take mine dry Mark: I dig the Beatles Stephen: I'm a Stones kinda guy Mark: I have fine taste Stephen: and I like things cheap Mark: I wanna stay up all night Stephen:I just wanna sleep, with your sister Mar...

had to see you one last time theres something on my mind how do i say what needs to be said? the words are hard to find how about bitch give me my money i want my money and i wwant it fast hey, bitch give me my money else i'm bout to take it out your ass 

You watch me on your TV. Say that my job is easy. Say I am not athletic. You think my sport's pathetic. But you can't judge me 'till you walked a mile in my bowling shoes. So I don't get all the ladies. Gotta mullet from the 80's I am known throughout the va...

I get home late from work tonight Baby, my body's achin'. Can't stop thinkin' 'bout you and me And the love that we'll be makin'. So I chill the champagne Light a candle or two (Baby, all the things I'll do to you) I love you so much my little heart is breakin...

I made love to ya all night long then i got up to write you a song i watched ya sleep and i fell in love ya must've been sent from heaven above don't think you could never do no wrong then you farted.... oh girl you farted.. first i thought that it...

Everyone knows Jesus The man who healed the lame. Well, I am Jesus' brother, Craig is my name. Jesus is the Prince of Peace. Jesus is the Lamb. Jesus is the Son of God, But Craig don't give a damn. Because when Craig's in sight, We'll party all damn night. I...

Harmonica. More harmonica. I got my twelve sided die and I'm ready to roll with a wizard and my goblin crew. My friends are coming over to my mom's basement bringing Funyuns and the Mountain Dew. I got a big broad sword made outta cardboard and that ste...

Lad, it's your duty to find ye a lass With child-bearing hips and a pink, supple ass And make her your wife and love her with love so true Now some rivers run high, some rivers run low When her river runs red, then she's starting her flow And it's called menst...

I'm a rich and famous doctor I always thought I'd be An expert in the field of Gynecology Next on my agenda: Checking your pudenda Let me see what I can find If you get your nerve up Slip inside the stirrups Single thought will cross my mind: I love putting...

Wanna have some quality time with my son So I brought him down to the fishin' hole Didn't like the feelin' of that worm in his hand Got mad, threw down his fishin' pole Said, "That's alright, son. Let's go and get an ice cream" "Let your old man buy you...

I kissed you on the cheek, "Good-night my love", I say, You turned to me and smile, a baby's on the way, and then you drift asleep, to dream of life anew, and I lie wondering, just what, I should do... I could kick you in the stomach, and catch you unawares,...

Here we are dear old friend You and I drunk again Laughs have been had and and tears have been shed Maybe the whiskey's gone to my head But if I were gay I would give you my heart And if I were gay You'd be my work of art And if I were gay We would swim in ro...

I bought a gerbil at the petting zoo If Richard Gere can do it I can too I get undressed,I start to lube I stick the gerbil in the end of the tube Wondering just how he'll feel Will he like it better than his little wheel Careful now he's right beside me One...

When Grandfather dies Life will be strange When Grandfather dies My whole world will change When Grandfather dies I'll scream and I'll yell 'Cause I'll be fuckin' rich as hell So Grandfather, die Don't keep me in suspense Oh Grandfather, cough Up that inherit...

All my days I live with my disgrace I’m afraid to show my face Or at least take off my underwear See I was born Like a half way neutered pet I don’t have a matching set It’s a part of me That just aint there Please, don’t stare Well I’m a gambling man with o...