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Tekst piosenki

WOMAN

I'm finally in love for the first time in my life,

I think I found the man, and I want to be his wife.

I'm all through with love affairs cause I know this one is real.

I've never met a guy who makes me fell the way I feel.

I've had to many men who never give, they only take.

And I try to sleep beside them, but I sit up all night awake.

And where I never thought to look he came the sunshine and it beamed.

I'm finally in love...with the man of my dreams


Johnathan takes me out dancing- I'd bet surprised how well he shakes stuff.

He's a member of the "Y" down in the village,

Which means he is a member of the YMCA. I saw in the score...

he's always looking for ways to keep his body buff.

Johnathan takes takes me to concerts,

he flew me out to Vegas just to see sleaze!

He makes a scrumptious apple cobbler,

and he keeps my apartment clean.


Johnathan is the perfect man,

gonna hold on to him for as long as I can.

Johnathan, oh Johnathan...he's the man of my dreams.


He likes watering flowers,

he tells that I'm thin and that eyes are pretty.

He picks out my clothes,

and we snuggle while we're watching “Sex in the City.”

Johnathan loves going tanning, and he thinks Howard Stern is degrading.

We never fight about the TV, because we both watch figure skating.


Johnathan is the perfect man,

gonna hold on to him for as long as I can.

Johnathan, oh Johnathan...he's the man of my dreams.


MALE AND OTHER FEMALE

Gay, he is gay, he is gay, he's gay, he's gay...he's gay!


WOMAN

(spoken)

Now I know what you're all thinking.

Whenever we go out on the town, we always go to clubs that aren't really my scene.

But Johnathan is not to young for me.


MALE AND OTHER FEMALE

No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No!


WOMAN

He's the man of my dreams.

We go to Broadway shows,

we love Taboo and the Cashafo.

We would have been best friends growing up,

who would've thought we both played with dolls?!


MALE AND OTHER FEMALE

Gay, he's gay.

We told you he was gay.

Gay, he's gay, he's gay, he's gay, he's gay. Gay! Gay! Gay! Gay! Gay! Gay! Gay! Gay!


WOMAN

wait!

He has tickets to the Russian Ballet,

he wants to move to the San Fransisco Bay.

His underwear drawer is never in disarray, when he wants to relax he likes to double crochet.

He never say “hi” he only greets me with *snap* “Hey!”

You'd think I would know that my boyfriend is gay.

Hell, I don't care if the sex isn't great, when I can have a man who recycles.

Now I can go on respectable dates- even if he's in love with George Micheal.


Johnathan is the perfect man,

gonna hold on to him for as long as I can.

Johnathan, oh Johnathan...he's the man of my dreams.


In Johnathan I found a nitch,

a wonderful friend and a sausy bitch!

Who really cares if he speaks with a lisp?

Why can't we get a speech therapist?!


Johnathan is the perfect man,

so he bats for the opposite team.

Johnathan, oh Johnathan- he's still the man of my dreams!


(spoken)

And if he doesn't wanna tell me, then I don't wanna know. 

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