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4-Legged Car

I've got a four legged car in my back yard It won't get us too far cause it needs new shoes And I'd like to be yours forever Four legs are better than two And when the robots come for me we can ride it Around the corner down the street to the haunted house We...

A Surprise Return

My christmas tree came back today Angry he'd been thrown away Last, last December My christmas tree knocked on my door Told me about the trip he'd taken back from the landfill I told him I was sorry and I didn't realize Christmas trees have feelings just like...

Aaron the Afterthought Astronaut

In the course of events that we'd lose each other Let's meet in the backyard in one week time In the course of events the backyard is flooded Let's find the nearest spots that's dry In the course of events the whole city's covered Let's find a place that rents...

Accidents

I took a drive And drove straight off a cliff And parachuted out before I hit But try as I might I could not pull the chord Flashback to every word my father said And as the ambulance looked for my body A little phrase entered my head What doesn't kill you so...

Actor Doctor

Oh how I tried To make the most of acting But the most I could find Was an infomercial part For a toaster with lights I played the 13th extra As I watched late at night Epiphanies did start Since 1954 There's been a high demand For nurses and doctors In movie...

Adrian Simmons

When I was just a lad I went on a hunting trip With Alberto and our dad We had an accident He shot a baby bear The sorrow was immense He said, "There's nothing we can do for him Time travel don't exist." Then he said, "Hold on to your horses You only own one...

Alberto Simmons

Alberto Simmons getting bloody noses He knows the time is coming when the bleeding stops Until that day it comes around He will continue stressing out He hates his job but oh, he loves his brother They've got a plot to take the world on with their style Using...

Allen Moss, Victor

The break room is deserted But I search it for my daily dessert And in cursive, on the first lid in the fridge I read these words: "If you touch this chocolate cake You'll be fired on the spot Now please enjoy your break Thank you sincerely Victor Allen Moss A...

Alyson Revere

Alyce Revere, she glows from ear to ear She says she's more appealing in the morning After 3 Minute Abs, a shower then a nap She surfs the internet until the evening But in her mind she's alright With the same thing every night She is slowly wasting time She...

Andre Revere

Andre spent three years all alone In his car, his only home It was a Lincoln Continental And Andre with his massive writing skills Obtained a memoir deal For several hundred thousand dollars Now he lives in a house With his sister and doubts That he ever will...

Archibald Aspen

Archibald Aspen, the world's greatest cop Didn't quite set out to be Promoted within, from his job taking fingerprints When they caught wind of his photographic memory Known across the earth But fame to him is worthless Worth less than the shoes on his feet H...

Art Guard

[Verse 1] Stop right where you are move ten feet back Away from the wall where the painting’s at I’m not here to explain what the artist felt Oh, I can’t and I won’t and I never will [Pre-Chorus] The museum of modern art I watch like a hawk protecting pricele...

Asian Grain

Asian grain Fallin from the ceiling like the pouring rain All the time is slowly going down the drain I can feel it in my brain And when I wake Everybody everywhere Will bring me cake And I'll be sitting pretty with your pretty face But I dont even know your n...

Aspen2K

I was born on the bathroom floor Of the morning that the world would end And when the day blew the clouds away Things were Y-2-OK again And ever since to my proud parents I've been their little two thousand man They say my fate since I once saved us Is to save...

Aspiring Lighting Technician

I am an aspiring lighting technician When I was young Flashlights hung on the wall I labeled them all cause I loved everyone And my father by his own admission Don’t understand Why I would stand In the back As the audience claps For an actor or band 'Cause he...

Autumn the Owl (Mistakes the Feelings of Being in Love with the Feelings of Being an Owl)

Oh I am just an owl But I know how To appreciate this beautiful world So don't act surprise That my heart lies With an Aviaria girl She is Portuguese At least I think And every week With binoculars Watches the street How my heart beats Aviaria girl [Chorus]...

Ava Aviaria

Ava don't you try To walk on inside Ava don't ignore my advice or it might cost you your life It might cause you to die Ava watch the birds Ignore all that you've heard Ava don't acknowledge the words Or they might cause you to die It might cost you your life...

Aye Aye Sucka Sucka

Aye aye sucka sucka, there goes Christmas I got nothing great but I don't care And when my applesauce begins to kill me Shoot the moon until the astronauts die in the carpet fire I've got something in my back pocket And it hurts like pasta Makes the cat...

Babyfood Jar

There is a baby food jar of ash from Mount St. Helens On a shelf above the desk atop the stairs And it's been in my family since I was seven But I do not know the reason that it's there So today I'm gonna take a chance and drink it Mix it in my morning's choc...

Banana Trees

Fall awake There's people calling out your name They all complain You sleep for way to long Oh there's things to see Apples socks, banana trees The dogs, the fleas They're smiling just for you Things are lonely when you're sitting in your room Just remember...