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Chicks Who Can Dance

If I took all of the traits that I see There’s that one characteristic for me If she can get her ass out on the floor Then I’d be watching, begging her for more It’s just something innate that I need Some primal force, emotions are freed If she’s got c...

D.V.R.

Everybody get off your feet We’re gonna dance to the TV Everybody now learn the beat We’re gonna have fun and be carefree Now it’s time to get up and dance This is your chance, now it’s time to showoff Grab a girl and start a romance Move your feet you...

Dead Bodies in the Attic

On a drunken night we got stuff still left to explore Diggin’ around and look what we found, a small place right behind the door Who knows what there is, who knows what we’ll find as we trek the unknown We might come across, some shit, a life lost, better n...

Dude Ranch

Gonna have the ultimate adventure Gonna have some real cowboy fun Grab my lasso and my denim jacket I’ll show you how the Wild West was won Gonna ride some horses, rope some cattle Gonna smoke a cig and shoot a gun Bandana ‘round my neck I’m ready This...

Folks of Interest

God of dating hear me pray, these words, requests I ask today My profile views show all time highs but perfect women I can’t come by I sit, I wait, I trust in fate, I hope, a mate, some women to date The ones I like I study close, all their details that I k...

Folks Who Like to Read

Book clubs, reader gatherings! Are all events I really should explore Library, adult novelty 50 Shades is how I like my whores Figure out a way to get these books out on the market If I could pick the type of people to which I want to target The stories...

Ground Rules

I won’t be satisfied! If you don’t simply abide! And I can sniff any lie! So listen and you can reside! I won’t be pacified! If you don’t trust and confide! And I can throw you aside So obey and we’ll be allied My house, my rules and my say These ar...

Hairstyles I Like

Going on a date tonight, make sure my shirt and pants are tight Whole outfits gotta coordinate, be ready out the door by 8 Grab the comb and sculpt my dome, my looks should really hit it home Been at the gym so I look fit and my hair is styled like Brad Pit...

I'm an Ass, You're an Ass

Everyday’s the same Everybody plays the game Always out there for the win Always will be, and has been All my neighbors hate my face But they should stay back in their place If there’s one thing that I’ve learned Its everybody gets their turn Everythi...

Kung Fu Ghandi

Somewhere deep down in in fantasy There is a book that you will probably never ever see It tells a tale of comradery Between Gandhi and his gang of Kung Fu employees It’s not published, at least not yet But I don’t think that you can write a better book t...

Letters to My Family

Here I stand alone by myself At my home, it’s prepped, for holiday feasts As I look around with such delight For there are those I chose not to invite! They won’t be here! They won’t be near! We’ll have such fun Neglecting someone! When the day arriv...

Magnets

Saving energy Methods cleverly Sticking forcefully Make sense, never me! Magnets! Trust in the science of them Opposites will attract Remove them prior to washing Post-It note on the rack They're here to serve a purpose Like forces will repel Make...

Mirror of Dickception

I’ve finished my exhaulation, but I’m not finished with thee I stand here before you naked, asking what have you ever had planned for me? I’ve been waiting for so long searching, suffering, misery But I must have faith in all you tell me, I wouldn’t want th...

Moot Points

Blind ambitions (Cold beer!) Your opinion (Not here!) Creature comforts (Glassware!) Your car (No care!) No! Cause I don’t give a fuck It just doesn’t concern me now! Do you hear what I say? Cause I’m starting to think you don’t! Family issues (...

Password (Your Name)

Some things that are dear to me Are things I protect very carefully Call upon technology To safeguard all of my confidentiality If it all got lost Invaluable cost I’d be right up shit’s creek There’s no getting back Memories of past They’re gone for...

Property Lines

Set your sights for your household skyhigh, decorative driveways can be hard to come by! All of that work looks like it’d be so intensive, but doing it yourself can really cut down the expenses Every part that you use is hand picked, my opinion go with the r...

Saturday Morning Brainstorming

If I have to live this mundane life man it’s really gonna fuck with my head If I have to deal with all these bills then I’d probably rather wind up dead If I could think of a better way to put my time, and money to use Then maybe I wouldn’t get so damn dist...

What's That Smell?

When you come crashing down and you get right in my face You need to realize that we’re not burning down this place Take a step back and just relax, everything’s OK We’re just using the broiler, it’s pretty safe I’d say Whats...that...smell…? You say y...