Ninja Sex Party

Somewhere, deep in the slow, eternal dance of the heavens Drifts a planet called simply Earth And among the otherwise unremarkable population of this planet Are two incredible heroes destined to save the future from itself! Hey, Ninja Brian, I made a time...

Hey, how you doin' (Oooh) Thanks for coming to my studio apartment... Got some shit to say (That's right) The times we've had The times we've missed The times we've embraced And the times we've kissed The times we've loved And the times we've laughed...

What's up baby? You're a very sexy lady What's a good girl like you doing in a 'hood like this? Your life's in danger every enemy's a stranger But good for you I rule this town with my iron fists Check my sunglasses for proof that I kick some asses No mo...

Today was my birthday party It was so moving I cried I had a super happy good time Until most of my best friends died (Oh god!) So I ran into the bedroom Where there was still some folks alive We had a pajama jammy pillow fight But tragically no one sur...

Uhhh Oh yeah, that's right C'mon girl This buttsex is too cold This buttsex is too hot This buttsex is just right Buttsex Goldilocks Hey guys, sorry to interrupt I just wanted to know how The song was going for the Hospital performance for sick chi...

Ninja Brian, I think I’ve figured out why our quest To be the world’s most intense metal band hasn’t panned out yet. It’s because people think we’re soft! We have to write a truly Satanic jam. Are you ready to get evil? Yes! This is perfect! From the dar...

Hello, class. I'm sorry but your normal professor couldn't be here today. So Ninja Brian and I are gonna be your substitute teachers. Are you ready to learn? All right! Hit it! Hey boys and girls This ninja science lesson's gonna rock your world Now close...

Why hello there. You're a very attractive young lady. I'd like to ask you out on the hottest of dates. I see that you have a lot of other gentlemen suitors. Allow me to make my case... This guy plays football But I once won the whole super bowl by myself T...

Oh my god, Stacy! Did I tell you about my date with Steve last week? You went out with Steve? He's so cute! I know! He took me out to this little restaurant- Everybody shut up! I have an erection It only happens 87 times a day Just stop what you're doin...

I want my P in your V Want you to S on my D Gotta J Off on your T's Then FYI I wanna F your A OMG! Just stuff your mouth with my Bs Don't LOL at my C And FYI I wanna F your A Girl, I can tell that you know what I mean But just in case, I will provid...

I am the toughest fucking ninja That you've ever seen I killed a king And changed the course of European history But that's all in the past I am changing fast I'm switching up my stance Cause I just wanna I just wanna dance! Look at me I'm dancing!...

A newborn deer runs through a field A rainbow shines from heaven A child's smile lights up the room As Brian blows a dude A star shoots in from outer space A puppy licks its mother A ray of sunlight through the trees As Brian licks a sack There would...

Once every hundred thousand years the most epic party in the universe will be thrown by Ninja Sex Party as it was foretold in the scrolls. So take that pudding, pour it on your chest and let it melt down your genitals. It's go time! Oh shit! Congrats your as...

Way back in olden ancient Greece Lived a most ferocious beast With eyes of flame and teeth of steel On human flesh it feast Standing over 10 feet tall No man escaped its roar (Roar!) Behold, my friends and foes alike The dreadful Manticore! Manticore...

We'd been friends for many years Until I finally confessed That I've always loved you dearly But you were unimpressed If I can never be your lover I'll accept our destiny And I'll embrace your gift of friendship As I jack off constantly Oh, I'll be t...

This song is about a problem that I have... Frequently There are three, three, three kinds of erections Some are sexual Some occur during periods of nervous tension But there's a mysterious third kind That no one really understands It happens when you...

Running really fast Jumping super high Flipping over shit Making stuff explode Flipping over more shit Fighting lots of guys Writing kick-ass jams Doing other things Giving you the sauce That's what we do cause We are Ninja Sex Party Shooting musi...

Since I moved into your place One year ago today Our relationship has deepened In a spiritual way As time's swept gently forward And winter's turned to spring I know you so much better 'Cause I've fucked all your things I put my package in your mailb...

Girl, I'm gonna take you on a date tonight So put on your sexy dress and meet me In my chambers by the firelight This night is gonna be the best of your life Oh yeah the mood is right You look more beautiful than poetry can describe By the way, do you m...

Dear Princess. This is a message from the battlefront, from your trusted knight, Sir Daniel Sexbang I have ridden thousands of miles I have survived the deadliest trials I've fought through battles you can't even dream For a taste of your peppermint cream...

Puppies in space Puppies in space Puppies in space They can't survive 

Oh hey. Did I ever tell you all about the time that Ninja Brian and I saved the world from super monsters? Yeah, that's a thing that happened. So please, pay attention. I'm talking to you, Doug. Jesus. It's the middle of the day, but darkness falls on the ci...

I met a girl a few weeks ago She's so smart and beautiful When she's around I feel my heart beat Down in the very depths of my soul So c-c-c-c-c'mon Ninja Brian pack your bags We're going on a cross-country trip ‘Cause if this girl and I go on one more...

In the tall skyscrapers of ancient Japan Lived two great warriors: a dude and a man Who proclaimed no sex until you are married They were Arin Neverbone and Samurai Barry Five-hundred years later two heroes were born One cloaked in blue spandex, the othe...

So you want to be a great lover Ninja Sex Party will help you train So much knowledge to discover We'll shoot a hot load of wisdom all over your brain Let's go! It's time for sex training Put on your weightlifting gloves and a thong You've been chosen b...

You're probably thinking to yourself "Ninja Sex Party, you're awesome!" We know But thank you anyway You're having trouble deciding Which one of us to have sex with That's natural But nice of you to say Well maybe I can help you out Clear up all of...

The legends say the chalice lies in the mountain of a thousand nights And he who wields it will become crazy awesome (crazy awesome) And all my life, I've wondered what awesomeness was really like So I assembled the greatest warriors of our time It was me...

Five feet high and three feet wide No one's ever eaten the whole thing and survived It comes with a bucket of ranch on the side It's the Ultimate Sandwich (Dear God!) The Ultimate Sandwich (Oh shit!) Its taste could drive a lesser man insane Served on w...

You've been counting all the days off Of your calendar for weeks now You can't wait for Saturday 'cause That's the night that it all goes down From 7:45 to 7:48 PM in particular 'Cause that is when I will give you what you need Three minutes of ecstasy...

Sometimes I wish I was even more awesome than I already am. What would my life be like if I turned this shit up to eleven (out of a possible five)? Ninja Brian, hand me my cloak. And my staff. And my horn. And that thermos of soup. I'm hungry but also thirs...

Lady, I Have been told that you only date nice guys Well, if that's how you judge a lover's worth Your ass just hit paydirt I'm the most sensitive man on God's green earth Here's a rose bouquet I also baked you some fresh crème brûlée Now, mount this s...

We're very glad you could join us today At the annual Women's Appreciation Buffet Where you'll get inspired to reach all your goals You're gonna fight all your foo like a thousand Dave Grohls There is just one simple key To unleashing the goddess that we...