Arrogant Worms

Baby I wanna tell you all my hopes and dreams and fears But I'm watching television, could you get me another beer There's wrestling and pro football on, I hope you understand I must watch it all for I am a man And a man has needs And a man has desires...

Oh Newfoundland, oh Newfoundland An island in the sea I love you oh so very much I'd join the ministry To show the people ‘round the rock When tourist season's here Although in my opinion It's a gem throughout the year Well if you're one for swimmi...

And here's a letter from Bill Macy of Gainesville, Florida It appears to me that Gainsville Sun is withholding information from the public. Recently, there was a four-column spread about a probable murder from a gun. Another item tells of a shooting deat...

I used to talk about politics, politics, politics, I used to talk about politics but I don't anymore. I used to talk about communism, socialism, capitalism I used to talk about all those isms but now I'm a dad And all I talk about is baby poo Baby poo, b...

Every rock band has this guy Not many people really know why He's got a cell phone and a backstage pass He's got a big gutt and a big fat ass He's a big fat road manager Big fat road manager Big fat road manager Big fat road manager He plugs in gurta...

I'm a shark I'm a shark A killer of the ocean I'm a shark I'm a shark Silently I strike I'm a shark I'm a shark I'm dumber than a tree I only have three thoughts And they are eat, swim... eat He's a shark he's a shark I was swimming in the ocean He'...

There are many wonders in the USA The cities and the people, and Disney World, hooray! But coming back to Canada with joy the heart does ooze 'Cause when you get to the border, you buy a bottle of booze. You buy a bottle of booze You buy a bottle of booz...

Uh-huh, c'mon, give me some, now. You know something girl? I'm thinking about you right now. You don't wanna know what I'm thinking about you girl, Or-or do you? Girl you think i'm the bomb But i'm old enough to be dating your mom, and i did She wasn't...

thank you very much now we're very, uh, we're very patriotic canadians and we'd like to take this moment to, uh, to do our national anthem, that we wrote When i look around me, i can't believe what i see it seems as if this country has lost its will to l...

Who wants to end all fighting except for in hockey Who shops for a truck based on the holder for the coffee? Who stands erect and insecure just like the CN tower? Who's a superhero but not a superpower? Canadaman! He eats donuts every day Canadaman! and...

I bought me an auto An '81 Ford Escort Wagon Now the fan it be broke And the tail-pipe it be draggin' I feel like a schlemiel My mechanic's fit for hangin' I got to go to Rust Check Bout the price I'll be hagglin' I can't drive it home 'cause The muf...

I bought me an auto an '81 Ford Escort wagon Now the fan it be broke and the tailpipe it be draggin' I feel like a shlemeel, my mechanics fit for hangin' I got to go to Rust Check 'bout the price I'll be hagglin' I can't drive it home because the muffler i...

Listen up brothers and sisters, come hear my desperate tale. I speak of our friends of nature, trapped in the dirt like a jail. Vegetables live in oppression, served on our tables each night. This killing of veggies is madness, I say we take up the fig...

I think I got a crush on Celine Dion the way she beats her chest when she sings a love song there's something about her, makes me want to feed her and i'd love to be mister celine dion She'll sing a song in english, then she'll sing en français both the s...

The holidays are over, I gained 20 pounds, The cats choking on tinsel, My needle stalked the ground, There are no cards in the mailbox, There's a stack of bills, Guess the holidays are over, And you're feeling ill. Have a Happy Christmas Hangover, It's the mo...

It's Christmas in Ignace Mommy's got a rock She'll give it to Daddy It's Christmas in Ignace (It's Christmas in Ignace) It's Christmas in Ignace Daddy's got a rock He'll give it to Mommy It's Christmas in Ignace (It's Christmas in Ignace) It's a jolly time...

Christmas is almost here Christmas is almost here Christmas is almost here Aaahhhggggrrr! It's just five days till Christmas I haven't done a thing Don't even have a Christmas tree I am panicking Most lots are all sold out I search until the night I end up w...

One year I got a dog for Christmas and I gave it to the boy next door Then I gave him my bike and my mom's bank card cuz that's what Christmas is for I used to give a lot at Christmas You might say I gave to much Until my family was broke and we had no place t...

Hey kid, why the long face Is it cause Santa Claus is Flying right on over your place You've been a bad kid all year So quit your snivellin' sucker And wipe up them tears You don't deserve a damn thing You're not even cute and your attitude stinks It must su...

It's the festive season There's singing and shopping and joy Santa's talking to children The elves are wrapping toys The season's one of charity Of peace for all you've met But though I should be of giving right now I just want to get Chorus: It's Christmas t...

Fat and docile, big and dumb They look so stupid, they aren't much fun Cows aren't fun They eat to grow, grow to die Die to be et at the hamburger fry Cows well done Nobody thunk it, nobody knew No one imagined the great cow guru Cows are one He hid in the...

Dad threw up on Christmas Day He puked right on the serving tray The stuffing's come right out of Daddy dear Now everybody's Christmas vacation Will be filled with a viral infection Maybe we'll all be better by next year We felt more than a breeze When Daddy...

Darling for you I think of what I'd so To keep you safe and sound I would climb the highest mountain I would swim the widest sea I would wrestle a gorilla to the ground I would fend off a dozen charging rhinos I would catch a storm of killer bees I would figh...

I once had a dog named Bob And Bob's a funny name for a dog If you're gonna get a dog, don't name him Bob My neighbour's name is also Bob And every time I call my dog My neighbour Bob shows up without my dog Hey, Bob, not YOU, Bob I'm looking for my do...

Watching television one afternoon Looking for a movie or a good cartoon Stop by a station's commercial break And suddenly I'm faced with a heartache The woman of my dreams is plain in view Selling me a can of liver stew I said Dogfood (Dogfood) Dogfood Woman...

George Washington was the president But now he's dead (dead) Mackenzie King was Prime Minister But now he's dead (dead) So don't go into politics You'll end up dead Don't go into politics You'll end up dead Oppenheimer built the bomb But now he's dead (dead)...

Drink with me! Drink with me! Drink with me! Drink with me... I'm startin' to see double, and I just fell of my stool! I'm sluring all my words and I'm covered in my own drool! I threw up on my girlfriend and we got into a fight. Man oh man, what a fargin' gr...

I'm not talking about an idiot, a moron, a fool or ignoramus, dunderhead, halfwit, simp or tool He's got charm and an appeal you can't deny he's just your everyday dumb guy dumb guys don't have much to say and it's probably for the best you rarely hear a dumb...

I have a little baby boy and Ezra is his name No one knows him now but I know he will be famous And known throughout the world for all his accomplishments But for now the main thing he does real well is eat Ezra eats He eats Oh yes my Ezra eats Ezra eats He e...

I came to town in the heat A lonely man with tired feet Covered heat to toe in perspiration Then you caught me unaware Body so sleek I had to stare And me a man in need of transportation I do not how you got Into Hernandez' Used Car Lot But I knew tha...

As a small baby Each time I cried My mother came to me To ease my worries and calm my fears with a sweet melody I remember hearing the sound of her voice As I screamed in my drool and my pee She'd slug back some whisky light up a smoke and gently sing to me...

Well me an' my buddies we got us some beer And a great big bottle of rye And boxes of ammo and guns to go with 'em And good old Charlie's glass eye Well we looked all around so we sees all of nature So calm and so serene But not for long 'cause we're gonna use...

Once a year we celebrate With stupid hats and plastic plates The fact that you were able to make Another trip around the sun And the whole clan gathers round And gifts and laughter do abound And we let out a joyful sound And sing that stupid song Happ...

I used to go to all the parties And make love to all the beautiful ladies And I'd eat cheeseburgers With bacon and extra grease when I was hungry And drink Windex coladas until my skin turned blue But now, the times they are changing My lifestyle, it is rearr...

When I'm dead put my head in the freezer Right beside the corn and the peas I may be dead but I am not deceased, dear One day science will re-animate me Oh I heard about the rich who when they die Get themselves frozen cryogenic-wise I know we can't afford to...

I love you so much I need the Heimlich Maneuver The sun goes down on another day A day where I haven't found love I try to eat but all I taste Is the flavour of a broken heart Then I saw you across the room I gasp and my breathing stops My heart's in my thro...

One day I sang an aria that caused a hernia it was a massive bulge to the doctor I divulged that I still had to play though it caused me massive pain I wont throw in the towel just please hold in my bowels I love my hernia belt I love my hernia belt it'll kee...

Scott became famous for freezing to death in Antarctica. Columbus made history thinking some island was India. General Custer's a national hero for not knowing when to run. All these men are famous, and they're all so very dumb. History is made by stupid peop...

From the deepest, darkest depths of...WHITBY! Comes this sordid tale of speed... Murderous mayhem.. Cataclysmic combustion... Picturesque powered pistons... Accellerating automotive alarms... Stunningly stupifying stereo stunts! One man... a dream... a car......

Everybody loves hot dogs Even pasty Hippies 'Casue its hard to beat a tube of meat But now a question hits me What the hell's in A hotdog I shouldn't ask maybe 'Cause i don't know any animals that grow cylindricaly So have a hotdog on me my friends It's made...

I am Cow Hear me moo I weigh twice as much as you And I look good on a barbecue Yogurt, curd, cream cheese, and butter's Made from liquid from my udder I am cow, I am cow, hear me moo! I am cow, eating grass Methane gas comes out my ass And out my muzzle when...

I am not American, Though I live in North America Which is part of the Americas Which should make me an American Geographically Canadians, Are certainly Americans As are Venezuelans, But not Hawaiians They're out in the middle of the Ocean Just like the U.S....

I pulled my groin It's the very best injury Though I'm walking daintily I pulled my groin I pulled my groin When people ask, "It hurts you where?" I say "Put your hand right there" I pulled my groin I pulled my groin I pulled my groin Though I do not enjoy...

I remember back when I was still in school These bullies always picked on me, they called me a fool They knocked me on the ground! They rubbed dog poop in my ears! They kicked me, they punched me, They said, "Come and fight you wimp!" (What'd you do??!!) I f...

I spend my days waiting TV with a beer (Oooh-aah, you're fat) It seems to cause my ample belly to appear (Oooh-ahh, you're fat) Then one day my woman went and left me (Did not want to sleep with a whale) She said she found someone more manly (A body that could...

I'm the only gay Eskimo I'm the only one I know I'm the only gay Eskimo in my tribe I go out seal hunting with my best friend Tarka but all I wanna do is get into his parka I'm the only gay Eskimo in my tribe well me and NUCK fluck chuck buck we both like blub...

Some folks call it spastic colon, mucous coltis, Provokable prostate, the Spanish call it colerico tripas I just call it grumpy bum And it's not very much fun Irritable bowel syndrome causes nausea, bloating and gas Irritable bowel syndrome is like pissing of...

All towns have a place Where decent drivers are not safe Where traffic law is touch and go Where the posted limit does not bind And half the drivers seem to blind And the other half is stupid, whoa, whoa, whoa Well Billy-Bob and Bobby-Sue And little Jimmy-Jer...

It's great to be a Nerd, It's great to be a Nerd, The only light we ever see is from our monitor We argue about comic books and Internet connections The biggest highlight of the year is the Star Trek Convention Our Town's not big enough to sign up any sta...

Hello and welcome to Live Bait, I'm sure you'll enjoy this unique blend of music and comedy and feel you've received ample satisfaction from this recording and now here they are, the arrogant worms If you haven't heard of me, I wouldn't be suprised I bet yo...

If you haven't heard of me I wouldn't be surprised I bet you know my relatives Their names will never die My mother is a saint And my brother is a god But all I am is Jesus' brother Bob Jesus' brother Bob, Jesus' brother Bob A nobody relative of the son of Go...

Johnny was a tall man, but his memory was short. He'd forget to duck at doorways, and often he'd get hurt. I took good care of him for he had no family. Accually he did but he forgot who they be. Johnny often liked to go out on the town. He'd forget where he'd...

I once was a happy man of sound and stable mind, Then my neighbor bought a dog. He put a ribbon on it's head to make it cute, But it still looked like a Chihuahua. He had me over to watch it sit and beg, It bit my knee and made love to my leg. Now it barks all...

About six months ago some one came by with a petition, Said "We wanna stop these folks, moving in next door", I refused to sign and told them everyone was welcome, Cause that's what neighborhoods are for. So they moved in and I'll admit they looked peculiar,...

One, two, three, four... Wouldn't it be great if everybody had a gun? /x2 There'd be no more crime, 'cause everybody'd have a gun! Wouldn't it be great if everybody had a gun? Wouldn't it be great if everybody had a gun? /x2 We wouldn't need the p...

Well grab your shoes, and grab your balls And lets head to those heavenly halls Sit on down and grab a beer Because bowling time is pretty near Tortured men forget their pain When they head to the bowling lane Let's go bowling Let's go bowling, got a coupon L...

The life of the artist may seem like fun to you That's cause you don't know the hell that we go through Waking up at noon working an hour every day And every now and then having to go on tour and play But it is almost worth it when we finally appear At the bes...

I traveled south for a holiday Drak some wine and mojitos Played upon the white sand And made myself an amigo I ate some shrimp and papya Thought the barbeque was grand But unbeknowest to me I at a little Cuban friend Chorus: My little Cuban friend Lives ins...

You double clicked my heart You upgraded my life You booted up my hard drive Please be my cyber-wife You logged into my soul You downloaded my dreams Let's go to my chatroom And I'll show you what I mean I wanna log in to you So I can prove my love is true Y...

I met you in biology in high school You told me by college we'd be wed You were my favorite lab partner 'Till you ran off with that brilliant young pre-med My pain would show up on a CAT scan My optic nerves are only seeing blue My blood hates to flow, because...

Oh Lord above Say it's His only son To spread the word of God to everyone Jesus cured the lepers And He healed the lame But He left the bald men with their pain Oh mighty Lord I lost what I had I've suffered the fate Of my own Dad I looked in the hills, the v...

Billy solves his problems by calling up his Mom Heather solves her problems with drugs and Alcohol Daniel solves his problems with a doctor and the law But Malcolm's got his own way and it's better than them all 'Cause Malcolm solves his problems with a chain...

Me work Hard five days a week, sweeping garbage from the street. Come home not one book to read, not 'nuff pictures for me see. Sit right down in favorite chair, wearing only underwear. Favorite night is Saturday night, 'cause me can watch hockey fights. Me l...

On the Mounted Animal Nature Trail You'll be sure to see All Mother Nature's favorite pets All sitting rigidly. They're never hungry anymore They're last meal left them stuffed. Don't worry they won't walk away If you you try to pet their fluff. Where the dog...

Mrs. Catto gets up at eight When she hears her budgie She puts her glasses on her face So she can see her budgie She reads the horoscopes out loud She reads them to her budgie She puts on her favourite blouse And she shows it to her budgie Mrs. Catto loves h...

Last night when I went to bed, With tangled hair apon my head. In every way I really was a kid. It happened with out warning, When I woke up in the morning. I can't tell you just what happened, But it did. I grew 6" in one day, Its painful when it go's that w...

Our love is like a new car smell Sooner or later it all goes to hell Somebody farts or spills some taco bell Our love is like a new car smell Our love is like a barbeque ignition You know that button you push lights the propane emission It works for a month t...

This week! This week only! No money down! No payments till Spring! No payments in Spring! No payments in Summer! No payments ever! When? This week! This week only! We pay the GST! We pay the PST! We pay for delivery! We pay for everything! How do we do it? How...

Open my eyes, what a beautiful day, Just the type that makes me want to say hurray. I'm still a little fuzzy-headed from my sleep, Into my brain, reality seeps. Look all around me, can't believe what I see These little, short people are surrounding me. I've g...

Well my baby came at me with a 2x4 So I fought her off with sandpaper It was 60 grit, it was really rough And it made a lot of sawdust But we patched things up with love and glue We went to the church and said "I do" Our honeymoon was at a hardware store Our...

I'm a real guy I like real guy things Like boats and guns and onion rings But household chores need a power resolution I went to the store and purchased the solution I got a pressure washer I like it a lot 'Cause it makes cleaning destructive Now I blow away...

Proud to be a banker! I'm proud to be a banker! I'm proud to be a banker! 'Cause I get to play with other people's money! I'm having a lousy day I burned my toast And spilled coffee on my best shirt So I have to change and then I'm late for work So I rush int...

Our fair country, Canada, is north of USA. Our Maritimes are lovely and our prairies give us hay. You might think you Yankees are better than us Canucks. Well, we don't need no microchips inside our hockey pucks. We know that you've got Disney World, and you...

It's the most frightening thing in the world It's the scariest sight I've ever seen The most chilling visual The most terrifying scene It's awful, it's crappy, it's monstrous, it's bad It's really really huge It's a fat man in a Speedo I'm walking on a beach...

Billy and his family went on a holiday They went down to florida to laugh and dance and play Billy went in for a swim he didn't see the harm But when he came out again he was short an arm Chorus Cause Rippy the gator went chomp, chomp, chomp Rippy the gator w...

My country's bigger than most, And if asked I boast. Cause i'm really proud, So I shout it loud. Though our numbers are few, We will welcome you. Although we don't have history, Gold medal winning teams, Heroes or prisoners, world famous volcanoes, Still what...

Who's the guy with all the tests? He's Sam, the guy from "Quincy"! A white lab jacket, a hypodermic Sam, the guy from "Quincy"! He doesn't care if you're alive or dead He'll perform an analysis of your head Find out if you've bleached your hair Try and fool...

There won't be any presents this Christmas No goodies in your stocking The milk and cookies that the children left out Will be left untouched beside the sink The reindeer will be staying in their pens this year The elves haven't built anything Cuz Santa got a...

oooooohhhhh santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass he's gonna kick your ass he's gonna kick your ass santa's coming and he's gonna kick your ass cuz you've always been a rotten little brat reindeer coming and they're gonna bite your wreath they're gonna...

Let me tell you a story about Scary Ned Scariest guy to ever wet a bed He had hands on his arms And eyes on his head But they weren't his He'd go down to the market And try to scare the fish He said that they bothered him They weren't his favourite dish Then...

he struts and he swaggers, he's pretty sure that chicks dig a guy in uniform grey flannel pants and wine covered jacket the smirk on his face makes you just wanna smack it couldn't be a real cop without the mental wherewithal so he's busting heads down at the...

As a little boy I dreamed of playing rock n' roll Playing in stadiums with every ticket sold 7 figure income from a 6 string guitar Dating gorgeous women and driving custom cars And then it happened when my record went gold Then I'm thinkin' what will I do wh...

I have been since seventeen a shipwreck balladeer Tragedy and misery are what makes my career Watery graves are my stock and trade, but it's getting harder For all the boats that now do float are returning safely to the harbour There hasn't been a shipwreck s...

There's a tune inside my head that makes me wish that I were dead It keeps on going on and on and I don't even like this song I don't know where I heard it first but now it has become my curse Wish that it would go away but it is stuck on replay Go away Go aw...

Can't think of anything to sing about, not much out there to sing about, The world's okay, The weather's fine, no need to sing about that, so i'll sing about. . . Sponges! Sponges yeah! Sponges! Sponges yeah yeah!! Sponges suck Sponges suck Sponges...

When I joined a band I thought my life was pretty cool We'd stay in hotels with room service and pools Sign body parts for fans Check into rehab and smash up the van But looking back I should have stayed in school. Life out on the road can be dangerous you se...

There once was a time when the country was wild, A time before cars, and planes, and mini-vans, So to move things from one place to the other, the railway was built. But, it didn't up and build itself, no, It was built by the railroad men. And among these men...

I'm out on the range surveying the land Thinking of the job that's to be done My life is hard but I don't mind Men like me that's how the West was won I stand the pain and the suffering For on the trail I am the king On doors I knock and on bells I ring Alway...

Edna and Ida are living in a home both in their eighties, both widows their kids only call to say they'll come by some other day Well christmas came and the kids did not so Edna said "thats their last shot" she called a taxi to the bus which took them down to...

Oh what is the malted-liquor What gets you drunker quicker What comes in bottles or in cans? (Beer!) Can't get enough of it (Beer!) How I really love it (Beer!) Makes me think I'm a man (Beer!) I could kiss and hug it (Beer!) But I'd rather chug it (Beer!) Fil...

Often on the weekend I'll jump in my car I'll not fill up the tank although I'm going far And if somebody asks me: if I'm going to a bar? I'll say I'm shopping 'cross the border in the U.S.A. I do not go down there to buy my groceries I respect our farmers an...

Christmas is here, where did the time go? Got to load up the reindeer, put on my red suit and go I use to like Christmas, but every year it gets worse Getting gift to six billion people is just too much damn work Got the Christmas blues, man this job is killi...

The table's set and The turkey's out Christmas is here Let out a shout The family's gathered all about Christmas, Christmas is here! Everyone is wearing big smiles They all try to Act nice for a while Then George calls his in-laws vile Christmas, Christmas is...

Young Derrick would love to take my order He works at the coffee shop just up the street He's happy and annoying with a smirk the size of Texas He's my coffee enemy Would you like a mochacino? Or perhaps a cappucino? Or maybe a frappucino? Said Derrick wearin...

Best things in life are not free But you don't need to have money To get the things that you want to own You just have to get a loan When you buy, small or large Just put it on your credit card You can live like a king Not paying for a single thing Put it on...

It's early in the morning, way before dawn I down a cup of coffee, put my lucky hat on Get down to the water before all the crowds Gonna have more fun than the law allows With my hot rod I go up to cruise When I'm on the prowl I never lose I fired my Merc and...

Through the ages, through war, pestilence and sleet, the Celtic culture has survived, it's songs and dances passed from father to son, from mother to daughter, from uncle to goat. And though few still speak Gaelic, the ancient language of the Celts, all hearts...

Gonna go out and play some golf ya, ya Gonna go out and play some golf My golf bag's full of the latest stuff I'm gonna go out and play some golf My putter alone was a thousand bucks I'm gonna go out and suck at golf Think I better take a muligan ya, ya Think...

When I walk in the room People they do bow For I am the guy with computer know-how I know what to do when you are staring at a screen (staring at a screen) That says fatal error 642 you don't know what it means (don't know what it means) You bang the keyboard...

I used to be a farmer and I made a living fine, I had a little stretch of land along the CP line, But times went by and though I tried the money wasn't there, And bankers came and took my land and told me "Fair is Fair". I looked for every kind of job the...

When you hear that i'm a cowboy, and i work the cattle trail. You probably assume i'm big and tough (big and tough) But the trail's worn me down, i don't want to hang around I've just about had enough (had enough) you see i like a nice cup of expresso, and i l...

If you believe in Darwin's theory I'm not saying you have to but it's an interesting theory Darwin said we all evolve from monkeys If his theory is accurate and who am I to say? Does the opposite work going the other way? If it does I wanna devolve back to a m...

When I was a kid I wanted to grow up and be a cop in a province town or county I thought it would be great if somedy i could only ever be a Mountie I wanted to beat up crooks and make arrests because that's part of the profession But now I just sit on my horse...

Christmas makes me realize how greatly things do change Friends lose touch, people age, and family moves away But it is what had stayed the same that gives me the most tears For I've had the same Christmas cake for almost thirty years Granny made it back in s...

Come back proud canadian's, To before you had TV. No hockey night in canada, there was no CBC. In 1812 madison was mad, He was the president you know. Well he thought he'd tell the british where they ought to go. He thought he'd invade canada, He thought that...

When Christmas rolls around Santa's busy in his shop Managing his elves and trying to cut costs His plant is out of date it needs modernization He has quite a large debt accumulation Elves are expensive, they do not come cheap And you would not believe the bi...

i had a love that was so bright. I used to dream of her each night and then rush to her side every morning(OOOOOO) i had her all to myself, we never noticed anyone else. we didn't even hear the radio warnings, Our love was no joke, you know it was the talk of...

Oh my darling I sure loved that meal Though I could still taste the pig squeal Now I'm weak and losing focus I think you gave me trichinosis Trichinosis is little worms that dig And burrow through your body after you eat raw pig I love you hon but can't help...

There's nothing good on the T.V (On his trip to Greece) And there's no toga parties (On his trip to Greece) So I see the ruins there (On his trip to Greece) They could sure use some repair (On his trip to Greece) The first day all I eat is lots and lots of so...

My father was a lawyer, mom's at university My brother and my sister, they both have their Ph.D. My grampa was a pilot shooting Nazis from t he sky But I am the most famous, I'm a TV weather guy He smiles at the camera and tells a little joke H e always says...

I don't like you and you don't like me We don't get along you can plainly see I just can't wait til the surgery Conjoined twins we'll no longer be Our lives are no longer in sync I'm always blamed for thou you stink You always act like such a dink Let's make...

This year at Christmas, everybody's feeling funny No one's making joyful sounds Cranberry sauce ain't staying down The lineups at the bathroom Are longer than at the mall Everybody's meeting Vincent The Christmas Virus Vincent the Christmas Virus He's the on...

People ask us why we sing, they say we really dig your stuff You must really love the things you do, is it enough You've all got university degrees that should be a start You can get a job a car a life, do you do it for the love of art Integrity and honesty us...

The US is the Eagle Russia is the Bear Australia is the Kangaroo 'cause they're kinda weird down there Yeahhh, India is the Tiger That stands so proud and tall But Canada is the greatest of them all We are the Beaver We're furry and we're free Yeah, we are t...

I never much believed in reincarnation Thought it was only people's imagination But now I'm forced into some reconsideration 'Cause something's happened to my cat That deserves some explanation William Shakespeare's in my cat My kitty is the bard He used to b...

WINNEBAGO! (Oh yeah!) Oh man! (it's so great to be on the road!) It sure is, man! (Hey, look at then little cars going beside us... Look how small they are!) They're so tiny! Oh yeah! (We have some great perpspective from up here in our...) WINNEBAGO! (Yeah, m...

Oh the Wolfe Island Ferry is a very nice ferry It's a very nice ferry it's the Wolfe Island Ferry The Wolfe Island Ferry is a very nice ferry It's a very nice ferry, it's the Wolfe Island Ferry! Oh the Wolfe Island Ferry is a very nice ferry It's a very nice...

I'm feeling hungry Empty tummy And I want to make it full So I spend a day At Wong's buffet And eat till I explode There's sixty types Of Oriental delights I gotta have them all Chicken wings And onion rings And sweet and sour balls At Wong's! (Come and sail...

I bought a ticket to Australia for my holiday Figured it'd be just the thing to wash the stress away Got my boarding pass and found out alas That I was seated in the middle row The businessman beside me smelt like Old Spice and gin The lady to the left was ta...